Home Educating - Why I've Chosen This Path

The thing is, I never thought I would be a homeschool mom. 

I knew I wanted to be a mother,

but I knew I could never be a "teacher."

I never wanted for my kids to see me as mother one moment and then teacher the next. 

One moment I'm making breakfast, the next I'm commanding children to sit at a table with a sharpened pencil and to to be quiet. Lesson plans mixed with recipes and chores and bedtimes.

No thanks.

Also the idea that little old me would even pretend to be smart enough to teach...seemed almost prideful. I don't think I put that idea in my head...but I heard it from multiple places. 

 Really though, I think I just didn't understand it. 

Until I was made to. 

My child needed me and deep down inside, in those dark places of the heart... I knew that only I could give him the security that he needed.

 What about an education though? Could I give him that? 

I did a lot research, weighing options...talking to homeschoolers that had had a positive experience.

I looked at the options,

in the end his security and comfort is what won. 

It was challenging in the beginning (often still is) but it's the best thing that has ever happend to me -

this "interrupting of plans." 

Isn't it always that way? 

There is an expectation, a force and a want where we feel we HAVE to do it this way, this one way.

 Then life happens and we make the choice to either stay on a comfotable path (sometimes uncomfortable) or try a different one. 

I was open - and the unbeaten path looked those most adventurous.

This post is not to say that homeschooling in ANY way is superior -

it's just to tell you of how it has effected my life for the positive. 

It's a written account, to testify, that one way really isn't best for all. 

The only way that's best for all is Love, 

anything outside of that realm is part of the great living experience and experiment. 

Choices, convictions, growing - it's all part of the very big plan of joy.

"Growth itself contains the germ of happiness."

- Robert Louis Stevenson

The first thing I did was investigate all the different methods in homeschooling.  Choosing the "elusive one" for our family has been rather tricky...

because I've found that I am drawn to parts of many types of educating - and as in every other area of my life....I've chosen a big mash up. 

Here is a portion of my  "I do not" list :

1. I do not like to be rigid...I don't follow a certain curriculum even though I have ones to help keep me on "target" (meaning the government's and their set of tests.)

2. I like a free flowing day with a little bit of structure - I like to have goals but not become a goal.

3. I do not practice home tardies and detentions and punishments in our learning space. 

4. I do not give out quizzes and tests even though my kids do take the CAT every other year (state requirement.) I would like to add here, not as a boasting but as general info, that Trinity scored in the 90th percentile in almost every subject on her test...and it was the first time she's ever been tested. 

5. My general philosophy is to teach my littles about their world through nurturing curiosity.

6. I do not use writing or reading or exercise to discipline my kids. I would like for those things to be a source of joy in their life so don't want to tie anything negative to them.

Sometimes, when I do get caught up in my own agenda I have to remind myself that this...is a home...is my little's only opportunity to have "home." 

Our home is not a school.

 If I want them to have a school education, then I would send them there.

 We've chosen differently...so hot tea and barefeet and free speech (if it's kind) is greatly enforced. :) 

Day's off for hormonal distress is also greatly encouraged - no one needs a basket case to be shoving diagramming down their throat.

Also, I am not the author of information and the last word on any subject...whether it be faith,nutrition, history, science, math, or English. I do not know best - so I encourage our kids to think for themselves. I guide them, show them options, but in the end give them the freedom to choose. I encourage them to be kind, to respect all people and creatures, and to find stability and security in Love and how He made them. 

In a very small nutshell ... that's my "philosophy" if you want to call it that.

Hopefully overtime, we will have clues as to where their natural "bents" are and we will do everything we can to support our kids accomplishing those goals - whether they want to study computer coding or be a great "store organizer " as Trini calls it.

“Knowledge which is acquired under compulsion has no hold on the mind. Therefore do not use compulsion, but let early education be a sort of amusement; you will then be better able to discover the child's natural bent.” 
― Plato

 My desire is for my kids to be able to take care of themselves...in any way that brings them joy.

 I'm raising hard workers, truth tellers, and people lovers. 

I'm raising givers, creative souls, God worshipers. 

If I'm permitted to have a "want" of someone else,

that's what I want. 

"Happiness is in your ability to love others."

- Leo Tolstoy

I love homeschooling because it has taught me to love learning. The world has been opened to me -

one I never knew existed.

Tristan's fortune cookie the other day read

"to teach is to learn twice."

I thought how true that was...and for me...to teach is to learn for the first time.

Today we finished workbooks, went on to investigating history...

ancient India.

  We became so involved in our learning that 3 hours later...

we were still talking about it. 

My littles were sitting on the couch, cups of Spearmint tea in their ever growing hands, 

and we connected and talked and shared...without limitations. 

My son that the world would say has "social issues" was completely connected to me and having a very social experience - an intimate one, a vulnerable one. His eyes were open and his mind was wandering and I saw the value in both - searching eyes, an energy filled body, and a questioning mind.

“The function of a child is to live his/her own life, not the life that his/her anxious parents think he/she should live, nor a life according to the purpose of the educators who thinks they knows best” 
― A.S. Neill

The kids did their math, and I could help them.

 While they practiced long division I went to work on all my little stuffed animal patients (many had suffered lacerations of the neck, ear and belly...) 

I sat in a chair and stitched, every now and them helping out with a word problem,

my kids nearby...working on math and feeling loved.

What a wonderful experience

... to see math, for the first time in my life, as not just logical but creative.

I'm thankful to have the opportunity to live simply, but to be able to keep my children close (not sheltered) and pour all of me into all of them. It's rewarding to see children that are 9 and 11 being able to bake applesauce muffins completely alone, find solutions, being  friendly and kind without the stress of peer pressure. 

“What is most important and valuable about the home as a base for children's growth into the world is not that it is a better school than the schools, but that it isn't a school at all.” 
― John Holt

What I've learned through this journey is that to homeschool...

I don't have to be a teacher. I'm not a teacher.

I'm a mom helping them discover the world.

I'm a mom that is encouraging them to love learning.

I'm a mom that will teach them to take a test ONLY because that is a skill they may need one day,

 not because a score defines them. 

“We can get too easily bogged down in the academic part of homeschooling, a relatively minor part of the whole, which is to raise competent, caring, literate, happy people.” 
― Diane Flynn Keith

"True happiness involves the pursuit of worthy goals.

Without dreams, without risk, only a trivial semblence of living

can be achieved."

- Dan Buettner

I have time to read more then a bedtime story to my kids.

I have time to craft with them, chore with them, walk with them... and have three hour long conversations with them whenever I want...because they are here with me. 

In this world of children, and especially in this world of children on the spectrum, I have enjoyed finding ways to keep them "out of the box." 

Educating at home is just one way I do this in my life - but it's been an effective way. 

“To confuse compulsory schooling with equal educational opportunity is like confusing organized religion with spirituality. One does not necessarily lead to the other. Schooling confuses teaching with learning, grade advancement with education, a diploma with competence, and fluency with the ability to say something new.” 
― Wendy Priesnitz

Unfortunately, I have been the brunt of a lot of passive aggressive comments.

I've been told things like :

"yah, well I wanted to do more with my life then just bake cookies."

I've been told by kids that their parents TOLD them that they should count themselves fortunate that they don't keep their children home all day sitting at a table doing workbooks. 

I've also been told them someday, hopefully I will think of what my children need and not my own wants. Yes. That one bit a little.

I've been told a lot. 

I wish I could say that I have a granite constitution and opinions just bounce off my soul. 

That would be a massive lie though - those words have made me question my own value and also my choices for my kids.They have made me feel unqualified at times to follow my heart.

A precious friend reminded me, during one of those days I was letting other opinions effect my happiness "But Alyssa...they are just deflecting on you - they are taking their own feelings about themselves and placing them on you."

What a sweet friend to wrap up reality for me, and hand back my sanity with a bow on top.

The nay saying was an excellent opportunity for me to learn to value other people's choices and also to be confident in my journey. 

At some point in time, I'm sure I will be able to look back at those experiences with gratitude.

“Homeschooling and public schooling are as opposite as two sides of a coin. In a homeschooling environment, the teacher need not be certified, but the child MUST learn. In a public school environment, the teacher MUST be certified, but the child need NOT learn.” 
― Gene Royer

I look around me, and see my daughter baking muffins and learning to double fractions in the recipe.

I see my sons chasing each other with underwear on their heads and capes around their necks and I see that they are CLEARLY not bored. 

I watch my oldest investigating and laughing and being shocked by what he is learning - and I know those facts will stay in his mind because he learned them through fun. 

I watch my daughter journaling and drawing pictures of her Paradise,

using apostrophes and colorful adjectives and learning what "anthropology" means. 

I found my little boy...the one doctors told me the world would underestimate because of his speech...sitting and drawing for hours and then cutting out his figures...with his little fingers that supposedly needed Occupational Therapy...and I know this choice to stay with them is more then baking cookies. 

They ask "wouldn't you like to do something for you...something fulfilling?"

In my soul, loving other people in practical ways is very fulfilling.

Learning is very fulfilling.

Watching kids run around with underwear hats and deep belly laughs is extremely fulfilling.

Being a witness to joy is the most authentic form of fulfillment I think one could every find.

Seeing kids write stories for fun is fulfilling.

Someday, maybe I will do something else...not something "more."

I try to live here and now...not in my future, and that is very fulfilling.

Constantly striving for the future instead of living today is missing out on life. 

Today, I am a mom that shows her kids that learning is an adventure, and is a life long process. 

 ~thanks for reading~

and just for kicks, because I DO love a good quote :

“There is no school equal to a decent home and no teacher equal to a virtuous parent.” 
― Mahatma Gandhi

“Real education must ultimately be limited to men who insist on knowing. The rest is mere sheep herding.” 
― Ezra Pound

“The home is the first and most effective place to learn the lessons of life: truth, honor, virtue, self control, the value of education, honest work, and the purpose and privilege of life. Nothing can take the place of home in rearing and teaching children, and no other success can compensate for failure in the home.” 
― David O. McKay

“We want our children to become who they are--- and a developed person is, above all, free. But freedom as we define it doesn't mean doing what you want. Freedom means the ability to make choices that are good for you. It is the power to choose to become what you are capable of becoming, to develop your unique potential by making choices that turn possibility into reality. It is the ability to make choices that actualize you. As often as not, maybe more often than not, this kind of freedom means doing what you do not want, doing what is uncomfortable or tiring or boring or annoying.” 
― Gregory J. Millman, Homeschooling: A Family's Journey

Week Favorites

“Thunderstorms are as much our friends as the sunshine.” 
― Criss Jami, Killosophy

He has made everything beautiful in it's time

- Ecclesiastes 3:11a

The little birds have found a new feeder - it's apple pie for all.

Aren't they sweet?

Today the kids and I enjoyed watching The Flight of the Butterflies on Netflix - if you haven't seen it ... you're missing out! In all seriousness, it was the best 45 minutes of my week. 

Also this week we tried overnight salt crystals ... somehow it actually worked.

Aren't they so "snowflake" like? 

We used thisTUTORIAL

All you need is Epsom salts, some liquid watercolor (food dye might work) and a jar ...

We also experimented with homemade play dough - we weren't too successful. Next time I think we will go the kool aid route but I didn't have any artificial colored diabetic drink packets in my cupboards - I guess a trip to the store will be needed!

We also finished our Maya Angelou chapter book - her life was such an inspiration and we enjoyed reading a bit of her poetry and also looking up videos on youtube of her singing - I had no idea that Maya was a singer and a dancer as well a civil rights activist and amazing author. We completed our unit study on Brazil (I chose Brazil without even realizing that the Olympics were going to be there...it was amazing watching the opening ceremony and actually understanding some of the local history.) So... there are new lesson plans to be made and projects to conjure and a field trip in the near future (Pike's Peak anyone?) and I'm pretty excited. Our homeschool journey this year has already needed some flexibility - a totaled vehicle and fevers and bad weather oh my. All in all though, it's gone rather smoothly and I think the kids are enjoying learning and have had some pretty joy filled experiences. I hope that you all have a good weekend.

 You are loved beyond measure,

Beautifully and wonderfully made.

~Alyssa

The School Year

Our school year officially began yesterday. 

I'm excited.

The last two school years we had a lot of hiccups....winding roads...mountains to climb...

chaos...if you will. 

This year I feel like I have a plan, I have the space, and my heart is in it. 

I will try and put up a blog post at least once a week to share what we are up to in the world of homeschool. Without further ado :

SLIME. 

We made it, it was a hit.

Making a gooey concoction like this is a great hands on science experiment....

the conversation can be about formulas, polymers, how to follow a recipe...the list goes on. 

 We used this recipe! Give it a whirl...it only calls for water, glue, and a little borax.

We are going to learn more about Mr. Edgar Degas for our artist unit study this week.

I found a nice book at the library and also some youtube videos. 

Have you heard of the Who Was series of children's books?

My kids LOVE them. This week we are reading aloud Who Was Maya Angelou, 

my two older kids have a chapter book that they read from every night before bed.

We are going to focus most of our attention on South America in geography this year. We usually choose a country (this week is Brazil) and we find a book about the culture, history, economics, that kind of stuff. Then we may do a craft like create a flag for their notebooks, maybe cut out foods from a magazine or pictures of plants and create a collage for the country. I LOVE the Expedia Travel Guides on youtube - they are anywhere from 2 minutes long to 7 minutes and they are colorful and bright and interesting. Yesterday we watched about Rio along with reading about Brazil. It's fun traveling the world right in your living room. 

One of the biggest blessings of homeschool is being able to create a beautiful environment for the kids while they work on workbooks - classical music in the background, a cup of tea...maybe some cinnamon honey toast. I found some black masking tape at the store that I'm going to use to hang their art projects on our library door - I think that will serve MUCH better then our kitchen refrigerator. What are some of your plans for this school year? 

"What we learn with pleasure we never forget."

- Alfred Mercier

Wednesday ... Imagination

At dusk last night there was about 17 inches of snow. Gorgeous sparkly stacked powder over ever surface of everything near.

Our house has so much natural light that this is the first time I've been stuck inside for days and NOT felt like I want to climb the walls or scratch my eyeballs out. No, quite the opposite actually. I feel quite content. Beautiful beautiful world.

I made this yummy little salad that someone had posted on facebook. It's pretty darn delicious - chopped cucumbers and red pepper and tomato, a drizzle of olive oil, lemon juice and some pink Himalayan sea salt - add in some fresh chopped parsley and viola ... health in a bowl. 

 I tried to eat a whole bowl of it but it got to be a little too much for me. BUT, I added it this morning to a hummus wrap with kalamata olives and it was positively delish. 

The sunshine came out this morning and the mask of fog lifted and revealed a white world as far as the eye can see. Those mountains are pretty spectacular. 

Today in Trinity's geography book she was learning the different parts of hills and mountains. It was pretty handy just looking out our window and saying "so to the left you will see a hill...find the foot and the hilltop. Great! Now over to the right you will find mountains..." It's great to have a poster world just on the other side of the window pane. Now if we could just get a island and a volcano we would be set.

My orange handled sewing scissors also came out this morning. The kids have been asking me to help Trin create a Rey costume for one of Brady's many "films." I had a pretty thick canvas curtain I was able to cut up and added some ace bandages around her little birdlike arms...the results was pretty spectacular. I'm pretty in love with the way she took on the role ....

... fierce.

... warrior like

... intense

... classy

... elegant

I just pointed the camera ... the leg business was all hers. 

Like I said, in love.

Brady also worked his camera magic

... high elbows, low hands.

Let's not forget young Luke...

... and his sidekick "ninja."

I've never seen Finn so happy to have his picture taken. He watched the other kids pose and then when it was his turn in front of the white wall all his moves came out ... I even got a little eye contact.

As for my own creativity ... I wood burned Zac and my initials into our kitchen table just for kicks. I love the concept of family meals and color crayons and play doh and glitter all being done on this table. Perhaps some day dress making and bouquets of flowers being put together for graduations and weddings will be done on this surface. Who knows, someday maybe a little grand baby will be sitting here, tracing the hearts with their little tiny finger. Either way, it's ours, but now it's even more ours. 

Have a blessed Wednesday friends. 

“Imagination is everything. It is the preview of life's coming attractions.” 
― Albert Einstein

End of summer...almost! ~musings~

Just living is not enough... one must have sunshine, freedom, and a little flower.

Hans Christian Andersen 

The weather here in Colorado has been glorious. Early mornings are crisp...a little taste of the soon to be fall weather. The days are sunny, warm,  and I'm noticing...a tad bit shorter. The planner in me is already getting together a list of autumn themed crafts and recipes to make mid September - I'm SO excited for fall this year! 

First of all, I will be turning the big (well, not really so very big) 30 next month. I feel like I have been waiting for 30 my entire life - it has always been my dream age. No more explaining to people why I am in my mid 20's with oodles of children (I had four kids under five by the time I was 26.)

 Yes, now if someone says "wow, you have a lot of kids for your age" I can confidently say "well, I am in my 30's."

 I think 30 is a confident number - it sounds like it knows what it's doing. I feel like 30 likes it's personality and it's hair and it's body type. I'm going to really like being 30. 

 My second reason for being excited for September is that Zac told me to sign up for the women's retreat at our church - last time I was away completely ALONE without either husband or a baby on my hip was almost 11 years ago. I probably wouldn't have been so eager to say "yes" to going if the retreat wasn't going to be hosted at a gorgeous facility in Estes Park. Friends to be made, sleep (if I'm not up laughing and drinking cooca all night), not having to share my food,  and gold aspens are calling my name. I'm completely stoked. 

With that being said, I feel like at least half of the projects I wanted to complete this summer never got done. I never planted flowers in the kids little flower boxes, I have at least 20 crafts that I didn't get around to... several hikes that never got hiked. Lots of things. Maybe that's the problem with lists - you can look back on them and feel bad about what you didn't get accomplished. At the same time, you can look back at all of the things you crossed off and feel pretty terrific. 

I'm choosing to feel terrific. Maybe not everything got done, but I can honestly say that we have been active, we have been pursuing creativity, the kids are learning to work as a team and to help around the house - and we are giving them opportunities to be big. 

I'm letting them make their own food, sweep floors, fold laundry....sand chairs and spray paint them! I'm letting go and in the mean time letting my kids be. It's been pretty wonderful to see all of the things they are capable of doing if they have the opportunity to do them. This summer has been a time of transition for our family. Our last baby became a preschooler, we have found ways to interact and connect with our Brady, Trinity has become an awesome reader and LOVES art...has finally made a few friends and can wash dishes as well as me, clean a room almost better then me - plain and simple...she's a little 6 year old grown up. Tristan has begun "pretend play" with his big sister which is a big step for a child on the spectrum - and most of all, he seems to enjoy it. This is the first season of my life that I actually actually see that my kids are growing up. Even though our littles are still little, I have had a glimpse, a taste, of life with older children. 

I love seeing my littles figure things out. I love seeing ideas "click." I love watching them grow. 

So with the end of August just around the bend, I'm going to squeeze as much as I can out of the remainder of summer. We will use up the flowers, we will be barefoot, we will eat one to many smores and replace meals with cold smoothies. We will play a little longer outside in the evenings, we will feed the birds in our yard, we will try to go for long walks every week (our last walk we found 10 baby toads!) Our littles will climb trees, kick soccer balls, gobble up as many blueberries and grapes as humanly possible....

...and I will start sorting clothes into "too small" piles. I will start collecting warm sweaters and rain boots for 6 pairs of feet. I will buy pumpkin and apples and stock up on hot teas. I will have echinacea ready and elderberry syrup handy. Time will keep ticking on...lists will keep being made and items crossed off - but my goal will remain the same in each season :

to find light in eight blue eyes.

School Photos ... Mama-Made

School on Monday - and Character

I always thought I hated science. Ok, I didn't think, I knew.  All those big words and concepts and for the brain of a creative/visual person --- most science classes that I have ever taken sounded like a tv when it's all snowy without a signal....just a buzz in my head that eventually either led me to fall asleep or stare in confusion. I told myself over and over "I think I can, I think I can" like that brave little train we've all read about. Except, I couldn't. It's was just so very very boring in every way. 

Until now.  

Who ever knew that learning about blood could be so fun? Reading about red and white blood cells, the importance of platelets ...sounds boring right? It is, unless you make the words come to life. A simple jar with white lima beans (white blood cells) and some red hot candies (red blood cells) and then a few lentils to represent platelets ...fill with oozing corn syrup for plasma and it's blood in a jar. Pair this with some interesting you tube videos...

... a "scab" model...

...kid's creative drawings of what's in a drop of blood...and you have yourself some real fun. 

I'm becoming pretty excited about all

I  they

can learn this year. 

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I've been reading a lot this week, trying to find...what's it called again? Oh yes, the elusive "silence." I found this quote by Mother Teresa and rather love it: 

We need to find God, and he cannot be found in noise and restlessness. God is the friend of silence. See how nature - trees, flowers, grass- grows in silence; see the stars, the moon and the sun, how they move in silence... We need silence to be able to touch souls.

Mother Teresa

As a stay at home, silence isn't something I'm use to. I long for it, and then when there are a few moments that I might actually just sit in stillness, feeling peace, hearing God...just being - I turn on music. I watch a show. I hop on my computer - silence can be unnerving. Silence can be uncomfortable. But, if you allow yourself to dive in, take a moment...and just simply be, you can hear. I've made room for quiet...some how miraculously, even if it's only five minutes, and I've already felt just a little bit different. I've been spoken to, I've been appreciative, I've been burdened and been able to voice it to God in a peaceful setting. 

One of the things I've been challenged to do, from my quiet and from my added reading (yes indeed, I've made it a purpose to start reading again) is that I need to re purpose as a mom the importance of teaching my kids Good Character. Meaning, I have to also pursue good character for myself. So, I decided to give us a new "class" of sorts in our schooling. We are naming it (once again with great originality) ...wait for it....

Character Building Class (applause is welcomed)

For our Character Building Lessons we are going to base several weeks on this passage :

 Galatians 5:22-23, “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law.”

I found an awesome link that has printables, memory verses, fun ways to teach the kids the fruits of the Spirit and to actually make it to where they can understand with "hands on" lessons. I'm hoping you might enjoy this  site as well. 

The kids loved the example of eating different fruits and discussing how you can never get an apple from a peach tree, or an orange from an apple tree. We had a long conversation about what "bad fruit" in our life might look like (anger, jealously, greediness) and then of course what the good fruits are (the fruits of the Spirit, love, gentleness, joy, ect.) They colored their little picture and discussed how the boys in the picture can show love for others. Then we did a creative writing assignment and made a list of the ways we can love generally (all people) and particularly (a specific person in a specific way.)

When I was little I loved the Music Machine cassette tape my brothers and I had, so I looked them up on YouTube. Lo and behold, they were on there and there was one episode about Love that I had heard years and years ago and just adored. I played it for the kids while I went to make snack and they were completely absorbed. You can find the episode we watched here. 

To end our Love Lesson, we went around the table and shared on area that we think we are pretty good at that represent the Fruit of the Spirit. We also shared one "bad fruit" this is a challenge for us. I encouraged the kids that when they see the other one showing love to speak words of encouragement and to notice and to praise. We also talked about just like a fruit tree needs to be watered and pruned and taken care of to give fruit, we need to pursue good character - it isn't just going to instantly come to us without any work. 

I always think that I'm researching and teaching my kids these awesome lessons that will be good for them, and in the end...I think I might be the one who is effected the most. 

When God tells us that children are a gift, you can believe Him. 

Learning and I'm thankful, 

Alyssa